Pet and I usually recount this adventure every year about this time. And I figured, since I don’t have the Blizzcon post done yet, I could share this funny adventure with you. Some of the details are fuzzy, but this is pretty much how it went down.
It was 7 years ago, and Pet and I are in the women’s underthings section of Walmart, staring down the wall of bras. While we’re there, a guy comes along, and joins us in staring at the wall of bras. After a couple minutes, he grabs one, and tries it on. Around his waist. Like a belt.
He notices us looking at him, and goes “How do you find the right size for one of these?”
I, having no common sense, and no shyness around strangers, immediately start explaining how a bra is fitted. If you’re not familiar with how it goes, it involves measuring under your breasts, and across the widest part of your breasts, and doing some fancy calculations. You end up with a band size and a cup size.
While I’m explaining this, the guy is looking at me like I’m giving a doctoral dissertation in Klingon. As soon as I’m done, he goes “I just need one for my Halloween costume. I’m going as a school girl.” I don’t know if we gave him a look or what, but he adds, “I’m a drag queen.”
So, again having no common sense, I say the first thing that comes to mind. “If you’re a drag queen, how do you not know how to pick the right bra size?”
“I use the stick on ones.”
“Oh,” was my stunning reply. So, I look him over, decide he’s got a ribcage roughly the size of mine, and dig out a bra that would fit me, with a cup size you could put cantaloupes in. “This should work, if it’s too loose, go down one size.”
He took off with the bra, and we never encountered him again, so I don’t know if the bra fit or the costume was a success. There were no news stories about crazy schoolgirls with canteloupe sized breasts in the news after Halloween, so all’s well that ends well?
Drag Queen: 0