I Feel Like a Romantics Song

I hear the secrets that you keep
When you’re talking in your sleep”

Apparently Pet is not the only one who will have conversations while sleeping. I do as well, to comic effect.

We stopped at a truck stop that was under construction the other day. The fuel islands and fuel desk were under construction, but the bathroom, gift shop, McDonald’s, Subway, and Taco Bell, were functional. We’d ducked into a very nice bathroom there, and were distracted by the gift shop when we came out. It reminded me a lot of The Open House, a shop in the Northfield Stapleton Mall in Denver. I was browsing through the glasses and napkins, shiny trinkets and suncatchers, and actually worked my way across a bench in the back of the gift shop to get around a table. I’d stopped to admire some cute napkins with grapes on them, thinking they’d be perfect for Pet’s mom, when Pet speaks up.

“Hey Baby, it’s time to go eat.”

“Okay,” I replied, looking around the shop. “Give me just a minute?”


As I look around the shop, I realize something important: I’m missing my shoes. I see foot prints around half the store, but not the other half. “Just a sec, I need to find my shoes.”

So, I go looking for my shoes, and find them tucked under the bench in the back of the store. “Found them!”

“Where were they?” Pet asks me.

“Under the bench,” I tell her, a little miffed she doesn’t just look at where I’m sitting. I put them on.

“Bench? What kind of bench?”

“A wood one.” I stand up. “Let’s go get McDonald’s.”

“What if I don’t want McDonald’s?” she asks.

“You can have Subway or Taco Bell.”

“What if I want to sit down?”

At that point my brain goes “What.” and I realize something’s wrong. The room melts away, and I open my eyes and realize I’ve been sound asleep in the back of Alberta. Pet is sitting on the edge of the bed, laughing at me. Hard.

After some discussion, I learn that I’d been asleep for the whole thing, and it wasn’t until I told Pet I needed my shoes that Pet clued in to the idea I wasn’t awake. So Pet, being the evil one, decided to see how far I could be pushed in sleep before realizing something was up. Apparently that was quite a ways, and had I not been asked about sitting down to eat (the dream truckstop didn’t have a restaurant) our sleep conversation probably would have gone on a lot longer.

Some day, I need to tell the story of Pet and the Sims, and Pet looking for a Marsu. I’m not the only one who holds sleeping conversations.